Potter's Wheel: A Search for Love and the Truth...

I am restarting this blog for the purpose of discussing relationships more so than promoting my novel, maybe both. I feel that it is important if we as sensitive humans are going to get any happiness out of life. I hope you will join me and add to the discussion wherever possible.

Wednesday, May 05, 2004

In Response...

A reader left a comment which all of you can read in it’s entirety on the 4/20/2004 posting.

She felt I was totally wrong on my evaluation of the sensitivity of men and the lack thereof in women and specifically the problems in the workplace.

Her comment was: “While it is certainly true that a lot of women have a hard time supporting each others efforts, both socially and in the workplace, I've found that this usually stems from their immense insecurities oft propagated by the men they seek to please.”

In my experience, women do try to please men in two areas: In the workplace & in search of “romance”.

Let me share another of her comments: “Men, by sharp contrast, are ever engaged in "posturing", if you will, jockeying for the position of "top dog" in business and romantic pursuits.”

My opinions are:

1. When women try to please men in the workplace, it is generally when the man is in authority and the woman’s endgame is advancement. My original contention is that women will do whatever it takes to get ahead even if that means trampling on another woman. First, that is not necessary all wrong. Men do it too. It is called “getting ahead”. I guess the important thing is what we do to get ahead. With the fascination of the public of the J.R. Ewings and Donald Trumps & Martha Stewarts of the world, it is no wonder we as a society condemn and applaud this behavior at the same time. I do believe; however, that women are more adept and more calculating in general. This is probably biological, stemming somewhere from the “protecting the nest” instincts.

2. It is also my opinion that in most cases, the “posturing” of men in the work place, and elsewhere, is generated by their insecurities and the inability to express their emotions. Women can talk and physically hold each other. Men feel they have to go it alone. No way in hell they are going to hug each other.

3. In romance, women will try to please their man until they have the hook well fixed in the poor bugger’s mouth. I don’t hold men faultless by any stretch of the imagination; most can be inconsiderate slobs, or at least messy slobs. But I do believe they are responding mostly in one fashion or another to their intense internal emotions. Ladies, men fall in love! Learn that and use it as a mantra. They hurt easily. And, they need sex, after marriage as well as before. I know you get tired. Men get tired also. If you want to keep a healthy, happy marriage, keep him satisfied and fed (and not with Happy Meals). You will be amazed at the pay backs you will receive. Screw whatever momma told you. Sex is fun, necessary, and healthy.

There are 3 main reasons to be alive on this earth: food, family and sex, and not necessarily in that order.

Enough rambling for today; remember, these are just my opinions and I could be wrong, but I don’t think so.

Chuck